Based on reddit [1] and other some other recommendations I got an asus ax4200 and put openwrt on it. I'm fairly happy, but some people have run into connection dropping (possibly due to ISP power saving resulting in link dropping down to 10 mbs, and something then goes wrong.) With forum help [2] I found a workaround: either turn off auto negotiation (works) or using a lan port as a wan port (have not tried).

1:

https://www.reddit.com/r/openwrt/comments/1cr1lvp/is_the_asu...

2:

https://github.com/openwrt/openwrt/issues/14192#issuecomment...