This is really the crux of it for me. Boys aren't coddled or soothed, they're expected to learn self-restraint, and expected to just get on with it. They're also expected from a young age to put up with being treated somewhat scornfully, so negative socialization has less of an impact. If we look at what VonGuard said of the boys he teaches [0], he said they 'go off ahead and get lost'. Note how this isn't shown as a positive trait (e.g. 'they try extra hard to learn beyond their limits, even if it proves tough'), but instead as a negative trait, as a problem they've put themselves into. Note how the girls in his example are shown as being cooperative by helping one another, rather than the more uncharitable explanation being offered: they're not brave enough to own their own mistakes, so instead try to distribute them across a group.
I remember this exact same rhetoric all throughout school. It's frankly unsurprising therefore, that more boys are more comfortable doing something that leads them to be ostracized, or to become a target. It's also unsurprising that more boys are happy to enter tech, where you're expected to constantly teach yourself without others helping you. For all the VonGuard's and the education system's suggestions to the contrary, working together and being cooperative isn't sustainable in a professional programming environment where you have to be comfortable with constantly keeping yourself up to date with changes in tech.
Frankly, the actual solution to the 'girls in tech' problem is going to be one that few pseudo-feminist social justice warriors will actually want to bear: stop attempting to blame conspiracy theories for the low levels of women in tech, and start raising girls in the same harsh ways as boys. I hear a lot of 'daddy daughter programming time' being mentioned in threads like this, but for the life of me I can never remember the 'daddy son programming time' that lead me to become a programmer. I can only remember no-one giving a shit about me learning to program until it started paying lots of money and achieving results.
I get what you say about coddling and framing, really. Kids raise to expectation and if you help girl every single time she struggle, she will never become self resilient and will never learn to solve problems. Got that.
However, how can one twist helping someone into "distributing own mistakes"? Seriously, that is beyond ridiculous. And going off ahead and get lost is also something entirely different then "they try extra hard to learn beyond their limits, even if it proves tough".
The point of daddy daughter programming time mentioned in those thread is to show the girl it is normal for her to spend time coding. Boys know it is "normal" for them to code. And actually, plenty of boys do tech stuff with their parents. It was always normal and usual to teach your son crafting and tinkering. When daddy needed to repair car or some furniture he would call his son to help.
It was not usual to teach the same to girl. The "daddy time" is just a call to extend the courtesy to girls too.
Small kids do try to conform to gender roles they see around. Girls and boys alike, we are all herd animals. Daddy time is an attempt to offset the message about her supposed abilities and likes the girl (but not boy) hears.
Uh, I don't think I was ever given the impression that it was "normal" for me (a guy) to like coding or math/science in general. It was definitely seen as a "nerdy" thing.
Men who can't cooperate might be OK inventing some new small gizmo, bit that is exactly what makes large company software development such a farce.
Every team I have been on with a women has be edited from their far increased tendency to communicate and Collaborate (which of course the best men do too). It's a little freaky how fast culture changes and longstanding interpersonal obstacles get solved when a woman manager shows up.
Uh, men can cooperate very well. Let's not pile stereotypes upon stereotypes.
I've heard that men actually get more competitive in the presence of women, which would contradict your story. But maybe you are right. Nothing against women on teams. But please don't claim that men can't cooperate.
What about the army, for example? How do these regiments work? Why do ex soldiers miss the time with the boys? It seems unlikely to me that they don't cooperate.
I really can't figure out why a comment like this might be in negative downvote territory.
It articulated a personal perspective (such a farce,) properly scoped it (men who can't cooperate,) referenced personal observation (team I have been on,) identified a positive attribute (tendency to communicate and collaborate,) ensured not to exclude men which have those traits and expressed amazement at the strength of the positive effects.
I'm sure I won't ever hear it, but I'd loove to hear from someone who feels this is worthy of a downvote...
I remember this exact same rhetoric all throughout school. It's frankly unsurprising therefore, that more boys are more comfortable doing something that leads them to be ostracized, or to become a target. It's also unsurprising that more boys are happy to enter tech, where you're expected to constantly teach yourself without others helping you. For all the VonGuard's and the education system's suggestions to the contrary, working together and being cooperative isn't sustainable in a professional programming environment where you have to be comfortable with constantly keeping yourself up to date with changes in tech.
Frankly, the actual solution to the 'girls in tech' problem is going to be one that few pseudo-feminist social justice warriors will actually want to bear: stop attempting to blame conspiracy theories for the low levels of women in tech, and start raising girls in the same harsh ways as boys. I hear a lot of 'daddy daughter programming time' being mentioned in threads like this, but for the life of me I can never remember the 'daddy son programming time' that lead me to become a programmer. I can only remember no-one giving a shit about me learning to program until it started paying lots of money and achieving results.
[0] - https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=7207075